yay high school is over.
hahahahaha i cried quite a lot at graduation cuz shirley started talking about blueberries while it was during final rollcall and i just burst into tears. she did too. then she stops and starts laughing at me cuz im still crying. AHAHAHAAHAHA. anyway its more that im gonna miss the whole concept of high school and its another milestone crossed in our lives. :O :O
this afternoon was so much fun but.
i think we need to find every single playground in sydney and go play there. one by one :)

pictures
after HSC? i think im going on hiatus now.
GOOD LUCK FOR THE BIG ONE.

MUCHOS LOVE.

and you wonder why you sit here fighting back tears? and you wonder why you have to walk around happy all the time :) and cheerful :))
and you wonder why you cant say anything becasue everything is your fault? and you wonder why you're so screwed in the head? and you wonder why high school is nearly finished yet you still feel nothing? and you wonder why you keep holding on? and you wonder why you're an emotional rollercoaster? you wonder why you beat yourself up for stupid things you've done?
YOU WONDER WHY?

these few days have been soo hectic! so many funny funny photos.. but i really cant be bothered to upload them....
2 more hours of high school left. wow.

im scared to let go the way you have. no im not scared.
i just dont want to let go.

not exactly the best time to start feeling sorry for myself but.

2.5 more days of school left.


THE DANCE WAS AWESOME! bestt oneeeeeee ive been to at ruse. maybe its cuz we all got so into it...

You give a little. You take a little. You don’t just take and take and take and take. You’re not 5 years old anymore. No one is going to be there to spoil you, to pick up after your mess. To stick up for you even though they know you’re wrong.

Friendship is like that. You take and you give. You fight and then you make up. Sometimes its always one person in the relationship that is trying their best to be the bigger person… but push them too hard, make them think that they’re the bigger person too many times and they will fall off the edge. And trust me… they wont even want to grab onto your hand.

There’s a difference between fighting and between backstabbing. Backstabbing is really unforgivable. When your friend has only ever stuck up for you, only ever listened to your problems, only ever given you support and you, out of the blue, start bitching behind their back and be an ungrateful bitch.. then you know something is wrong with that relationship.

Maybe you’ve been in both positions?

High school is coming to an end and it really makes you wonder who you can truly call a friend.

Who do you miss as a friend?

Who do you wish you had never met?

Who do you wish you could say “hey… I miss you. I wish we hadn’t grown apart.”

Whose had the most impact on your high school life?

Friendship isn’t about the good times or the happy times or the times we go “shopping together” or “watch movies” together or “sing happy songs” together or “be high” together. Its about the hard times when someone has truly been there for you and listened to what you have to say and been able to give you advice and point you in the right direction to go. (even if you don’t take their advice…) Its about those memories that however hard you try to push out of your head they still stand brick solid.

Be honest with yourself and ask yourself how many real friends do you have? Friends that aren’t just there when you need to go and dota with… friends not only there when you want to go and buy a new dress or when you need someone to listen to what funny dream you had yesterday night.

But a friend you can sit in silence with and still have fun with (in a way…). Like a mutual understanding. “hey I wont say anything and you wont say anything but we’ll understand each other perfectly..”

I don’t like it when I have to fight with the people I actually care about. Gawd if I don’t care about you I couldn’t give a flying monkeys ass whether you like me or not or what your opinion is of me. (oh go cry a river.. everyone feels the same) I’m sure no one likes it when they have to fight with friends. Maybe cuz im getting my rags soon but at the moment its just taking such an “ARGHHHHHH” toll on me.

Or maybe its cuz we graduate high school in 3.5 days and I will never see some people again and just want to leave on a good note?

But I must say that if your opinion on your own friend is so easily swayed by someone else. A third party. Then you really should be questioning your friendship. If you know someone better than someone else and yet what they say affects the way you view that someone… then you should just pack your bags and walk out of that relationship when you still have some dignity before you really do some damage.

ON A BRIGHTER NOTE!

I totallyyyy loovveeee lotr.. I watched the 3^rd one again today. WOOOO

The HSC IS FRICKING SOON! (that’s not really a brighter note but…) MSN is getting deleted tomorrow night for sure. Actually maybe not… but my password will be given away for sure actually no not really… I don’t like it when other people know my password…

Did you know my camera features in Avril Lavigne’s “When you’re gone” video clip? YEAP… don’t I feel special?

that was a really long post.
now i should go to keep writing my scholarship letter. and keep kissing some university butt.

xoxo




edit.
but then again... (i was thinking when i reread the post.. yes i reread my own posts.. big deal...) that sometimes we can get blinded by our friends becasue in our eyes we dont see their flaws while other people can? gawd... we should just all be misers and hate each other.. haha then this wouldnt happen =.=

one more week of proper school left! like literally. i cannot say that i am unhappy. im gonna be photodumping quite a lot these days.
yeah ok
"suck too hard on a lollipop and love's gonna get you down"
bye

HELLLO!
PHOTO DUMP
in random order.
some from helen/celia's birthday dinner some just random from school
HAPPY BIRTHDAY AK-NIGGERG

i had all these songs that describe my mood today. now ive forgotten them all...

I've been crying for so long, fighting tears just to carry on, but now, but now, its gone away.

WE HAVE TO TAKE OUR CLOTHES OFF! WE HAVE TO PARTY ALL NIGHT! WE HAVE TO TAKE OUR CLOTHES OFF TO HAVE A GOOD TIME GOOD TIME!

i wanna stand with you on a mountain. i wanna bathe with you in the sea. i wanna lay like this forever. until the sky falls down over me.

I'LL BE THERE FOR YOU... WHEN YOUR WORLD STARTS TO FALL. ILL BE THERE FOR YOU... LIKE IVE BEEN THERE BEFORE

dont pretend i think you know im damn precious. and hell YEAH, im the ___ princess. i can tell you like me too and you know im right

For every piece of me that wants you, another piece backs away





i dont think you know or have the tiniest ounce of realisation of how much i will miss you after school is over. just your presence everyday. its comforting in a way. (that like rhymed..hehe) im still curious about you (not in a sick way!) but in a... "i wonder how you are. when you walk around i wonder what you're thinking and wonder what your feeling" way.

sometimes there are things that you cant just see with the naked eye.

school ends in 8 days.
oh yeah by the way the stupid school fence electrocuted my face. and then i passed it onto becca cuz i was holding her arm. >:(

today is... helen minhye hong's birthday. she's 18!!. ive known her since i went to hurstville public school. was was in year 5. 1999. so its been 8 years. a longgg steady 8 years.
there isnt much words to describe what she means to me. or how much i miss her.
so lets let the pictures do the talking yes?












xoxoxoxoxoxoxo my pino.
love you long time
MONO


--edit.
when i left nsg i made my group these little acrostic poems. and i just found the one about helen. its pretty lame but i tried....
AHEMMMM

H is for the happiness you give to me
E is for my everlasting love for you
L is for the laughter you bring to me
E is for the encouragement you have given to me
N is for never gone, you'll never be gone to me.

HAHAHA i hope you survived that. cringe factor x 10 billion? YEAP